Your loved ones have a duty to prop you up and care for you, but that's not all they are there to do. And about those whom you do end up telling, be very careful. There are many otherwise fine, wonderful people who couldn't navigate someone else's depression if their life depended on it. Ideally, you'd be able to tell all of them, but you probably can't in actuality. However, the people you are really close to ought to know what you're going through. If you feel that you have to let it out and make it known, do it if it feels right – but it's unlikely to be of any further help and may not be worth the awkwardness created. There is a catharsis in honesty, but it really falls under the umbrella of personal stuff that most of the people in your life can't really be bothered with. Having acknowledged this, what do you do about other people? In my experience, it's not necessarily useful to make it public knowledge. Yes, you'd rather not be sad most of time, but you are and that isn't immoral. So, the first and most important step is to admit that you are not in a good place, and that this is fine. I hope it helps, but it's not meant to be authoritative. I have, however, about a decade's worth of experience with the state of mind and can talk about how I've been trying to get better. You absolutely should not look to me for definitive guidance on this subject, and if you write to me, I won't necessarily be able to say anything useful that won't be in the rest of this article.
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I am not an expert in mental health – or in anything else, for that matter. It really is the only way to quickly get across the state of mind. We will have to settle for 'depression', with all due respect and consideration to those who struggle from what that word means in a medical context. 'Melancholy' is closer to the mark but has associations with sweet artistry that don't quite match up to some of the more sinking thoughts that arrive at 3AM. So what word do we, the undiagnosed, take refuge in? 'Sadness' doesn't cover the scale of it, even in its milder forms.
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